…but it also doesn’t tell the full story. I was getting ready to have a shower earlier today and I looked in the mirror just before getting in. I still get a shock to see my gigantic tummy that looks like its been stuck onto me. Then I took a moment to really look.
I have a lot more stretchmarks this time around. I am terrible at moisturing or doing anything ‘chronic’. (I still have two and a half months supply of preggie vitamins when I bought the exact amount and I’m due in a week 😐.) It’s at the bottom of my tummy, a few next to my belly button and on my upper thighs (the stretch marks not the vitamins). I’m pretty sure my butt did not escape unscathed but I wasn’t brave enough to turn around and check. Some things are best left unknown. My once perky boobs are now unrecognisable and resting on my tummy like two giant balloons just waiting to be inflated. My skin has also taken a beating from pigmentation with weird darker patches appearing on my torso in random places. I know this is not a complimentary description but that’s what things are looking like at the moment.
My first pregnancy I was horrified by these changes and wouldn’t let my husband see me naked. This time around I leave the bathroom door open and chat to him while I shower (ok there are some times when I do hide and change with the towel still around me but that’s coz the bedroom light is so frikken bright it highlights every cellulite dimple and magnifies it!). This is also because my daughter is now in and out of the bathroom and I don’t want her to ever see me feeling ashamed or embarassed of my body lest she feels she should feel the same way.
Anyway, I didn’t give much thought to this whole body image story until I was laying in bed now and feeling like a beached whale. Then it occurred to me that I am growing another person. An actual human being. From scratch. I knew this of course but in the way that you know bananas have seeds but you never really thought of a banana growing from a seed (ok that was super random but it’s after midnight so cut me some slack 😂). Once the baby is out I will also be (hopefully) keeping this child alive purely from what my body produces. Nature really is amazing. So I’m going to try not to stress about this new body I have. I will get back into working out when I’m not feeling like a zombie anymore. (I put on 8kgs with this pregnancy but I actually want to lose 16) I will also accept my stretchmarks and saggy sock boobs because they are a result of having two beautiful and amazing daughters in my life. It’s an insignificant price to pay.
6 more days to go to meet our new addition.